Carving out quality time with my kids
Quality time is my love language. Authentic, one-on-one time with those that I love is something that fills me up. It often gives me a great sense of connection, especially with my husband and kids.
My husband and I have worked on ways to spend quality time together when the commodity of time is limited. But Im learning on ways to connect with my kids, together and individually.
I often fret over what kinds of activities to do with my kids-desiring elaborate and adventurous outings that would be memorable and fun. I always envision and aim to be one of those moms who has a fun craft activity at any moments notice. Or perhaps, one who has a list of fun outings ready for adventure at any time. Amazing intentions and goals, right? Here is how it would unfold instead. I would forget some vital part of the craft, return to the store 3 more times over, spend an exorbitant amount of time prepping and setting up for the craft to take a total of 10 minutes with the kids. Im neurotic about spilling, staining or messing anything up. The kids are quickly over it and then I’m left to clean it up for the next hour by myself. And this is all trying to be done in between working hours, carpools and after school sports/activities.
Heres the thing, perhaps Im a little more up-tight of a mom than I’d like to be. But I just crave authentic quality time with my little ones amidst the school and work schedules, after-school activities and work-life obligations.
So I’ve taken a couple plays from Joanna Gains playbook on life, family and kids. And here is what stuck with me and Ive found to be helpful perspective on getting quality time with my kiddos.
While the complicated pinterest craft idea and the interactive museum which is 100 miles away, sound spectacular and an experience your child may never forget-sometimes elaborate and complicated are not necessary. I’ve found that some of the best times my kids and I have had together, have been simple ideas.
Here are some ideas for carving out inexpensive, simple, and fun quality time with your child or children.
A breakfast, lunch or dinner date. One-on-one time is easy over a meal and when it’s just you two, the conversation can be more centered around your little one’s interests.
Get outside. We will often scooter around our neighborhood and explore new areas. It’s easy to come up with games my kids can both feel like they are included in, like follow-the-leader. They both have my full attention and I have theirs.
Take them on an errand. Okay, so sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn’t. Unfortunately, I’ve dragged my kids on too many “errands” to costco and they have been bored to tears. But I’ve found having a kid tag along often allows for time to talk in the car or time together thats uninterrupted by the other sibling.
Let them participate in household chores and responsibilities with you. So I imagine as my kids get older this will no longer be something they will want to do. For now, they are both young enough that they love to help and love to do responsibilities that gives them the freedom to feel like they are older than what they are. For example, on the weekend, we make pancakes together. Cracking eggs, measuring mix, stirring, pouring and cleaning-we do it all together and they love it. We will make cookies together, lunches, you name it, they love to participate and it gives us time together. Cooking is an easy one but Ive also had then help me fold laundry or put groceries away. We can easily think up a game or song while doing the “chore” or sometimes the time allows for them sharing whatever is on their mind.
Take them to a coffee shop, frozen yogurt or smoothie shop. This is my favorite because it involves coffee for me. Lol. Often I will pick a kid up from school (because they get out at different times) and head over to Starbucks. Its a treat for both of us. We enjoy our snack and enjoy some time together, just us.
Coloring. Do you know there is adult coloring books out there? So apparently, kids and adults alike enjoy coloring books. I don’t know if I could really get into coloring by myself but as an activity with my youngest, I find that it often leads to her telling me about her day or whatever seems to be on her mind at the time. It’s a focussed activity that doesn’t involve screen time but does involve us actively spending time together.
Quality time is one of the most important things for me to feel connected with my kids, to foster my relationship with them and for me to show them how much I love them. However, having enough time is such a sought out commodity. So much of my time is needed for normal adulting responsibilities. I find that I can give of myself to them in less extravagant, complicated and often expensive ways that often mean so much more to my kids. Hopefully this give you some ideas and if anything, some peace of mind, knowing that you can easily find the joy in the regular everyday moments with your kids.
Stay happy & healthy!
Jennifer
